Saturday, May 9, 2026

The Old Coot pens an article. Published in Owego NY on May 6, 2026

 The Old Coot pens an article.

By Merlin Lessler

All of a sudden, I noticed my pen supply in the kitchen was nearing extinction. No problem. Or so I thought. I’ll just go to my office and grab a handful; they probably just migrated there. Guess what? That pen holder was also down, only two pencils and one pen. I checked the garage, no help there. So, where are the pens? I’m sure I had an overflowing supply of pens. Someplace.

It’s quite irksome, especially since I’m a hog when it comes to free pens. Like at the bank, when the clerk says to take a couple. I do, but more than a couple. Some banks fasten their pens to a chain. I’m not getting to many places that hand out pens. It’s my own fault. I do most of my banking online or at an ATM.

Doctor’s offices don’t give away pens; they do let you borrow one to write a note to yourself. For me it’s usually a doctor’s name. I can’t remember it ten seconds after I hear it. The receptionist acts as a chain connected to the pen in those places.

Now, I’ll have to buy some new pens. Probably several six packs at the Dollar store. That, and I’ll be on the lookout for freebies. Beware to places with a bunch of pens out in the open for customer use. An old coot is on the prowl.

Ps. I bought two packages of pens at the dollar store. One had four pens with a nice rubberized grip.  The other package had six red colored pens. Great! I told myself; they will stand out when I drop one someplace around the house. Then my wife asked why I bought so many pens with red ink. (Because I didn’t read the label on the package, is what I should have said. But, I do that all the time and don’t get what I think I’m getting.) Instead, I said I like red ink a lot.

PPS. – I found the missing pens. I’d collected some of the excess pens a few months ago and put them in a place where “I’d never forget.” But I did.

Comments? Send to mlessler7@gmail.com

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