The Old Coot explains the
blockade (in his head).
By Merlin Lessler
I was eavesdropping on a
bunch of old guys the other day who were sitting around sipping coffee and
shooting the breeze. I was two tables away, trying to come up with an old coot
article; a blank page in my notebook stared up at me, mocking my lack of
creativity. Besides, it was more interesting to witness what was going on with
the old guys. It soon dawned on me why we (old coots) have memory problems. Our
brains are clogged with unanswered questions – “What was that guy’s name?” –
What was the name of that movie, restaurant, town and the like?”
I watched the old guys repeatedly
stop in mid-sentence if they couldn’t come up with the name of someone or
something. The conversation stagnated as everyone tried to help with the answer.
Eventually, the speaker spit out, “Whatever,” and continued on with his tale.
Sometimes the conversation broke down completely, with everyone staring off
into space using all the memory tricks they could think of, like running
through the alphabet, to come up with the tidbit that was hidden in the cobwebs.
Their conversation was
sprinkled with “What’s-his-names” – “Watcha-a-call its” – “Thing-a-ma-jigs” and
the like. Everyone left with unanswered questions, adding to the traffic jam in
their brains. Those new bits of unremembered facts clump up and increase the blockage
in the channels to our memory files. It’s a memory death spiral; the more
unanswered items that laze in the gray matter, the worse the problem gets.
Google helps a bit, but many items can’t be answered by Siri or Alexa.
It’s not just old coots who
are impacted by memory clogs. Young people have this problem too. They just
don’t get as frustrated as we do, and they aren’t worried that onlookers will
think they’re senile. They also have more blank space to accommodate the buildup.
I was prepared to conclude this column with a clever, astute bit of wisdom.
Unfortunately, I lost my train of thought and can’t remember what it was. I
just know it was great.
Comments? Send to
mlessler7@gmail.com
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