The Old Coot & the
bully.
By Merlin Lessler
Got a little cold coming
on? With a tickle in your throat? That teases you into a cough, or two, or
three? Now take that tickle to a public place – a group dinner you couldn’t get
out of. You have one thing on your mind, suppress the urge to cough; resist the
tickle. The activity around you is a blur. You sip water to kill it, but the
tickle makes its presence known. You do a small, “Ahem,” to quiet it down.
You’re OK for a minute, but you have to stay focused on the cough bully lying
in wait in your throat. He’s in a recliner; his hands are behind his head, as
though sunning himself on the beach, thinking, “I’ll wait, and get him when everyone’s
eyes are focused on him.”
Been there? Done that? Maybe,
in the dentist’s chair? The barber or hairdresser’s chair? Or, in any up close
and personal situation. Like church. The movies. Or, worst of all, on a crowded
airplane. It’s like that prom pimple that pops out on the end of your nose. Or,
that canker blister on you lip, before a first date. Add the two together and
throw in a bad hair day and you have the Triple Dipple Bully of Cruelty.
I can think of another
element to add while at dinner with a cough bully. The ice cream headache.
Somehow, you make it through the main course. Without too many instances when
you couldn’t keep the menace at bay. You order a dish of ice-cream, in hopes to
sooth the monster. But you eat it too fast, and a stabbing pain strikes your
forehead and temple: the dreaded ice-cream headache. It distracts your
attention from the tickle in your throat and now you are wincing in pain and
coughing at the same time. All is lost!
Comments? Send to
mlessler7@gmail.com
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