The
Old Coot weathers the storm.
By
Merlin Lessler
Weather
was the lead story on the evening news the other night, “A DANGEROUS snowstorm is
moving across the Midwest!” Not just a snowstorm, mind you, a DANGEROUS snowstorm,
causing a twenty-car pileup on the interstate, snow drifts, icy conditions. On
and on went the reporter. A newspaper headline went one better, saying that a
mixed bag of glop imperils the eastern states. IMPERILS? Wow, that’s bad! We
used to just call these events, winter weather or a snowstorm. Now, the media hypes
it up, hoping to make its listeners and readers afraid of the weather and
tuning in, to keep up to date. I rant about this every year, lastly, on July 4,
2018. I promised myself to not let them get to me, and then I relapse. So here
I go again. Just in time, before the end of 2019.
I
yell at the TV, A storm isn’t dangerous; it’s people who drive like maniacs,
who don’t allow for the conditions. They’re the danger, not the storm. It’s
winter; what do you expect? It snows; it gets cold, things freeze, sidewalks
are slippery, wires come down, power goes out. SO WHAT! Are we, the species at
the top of the food chain, incapable of dealing with weather? (The news media
thinks so.)
They
trot out the “wind chill factor,” to scare us even more. A reporter (or
meteorologist) will say, “The temperatures will be in the low twenties, but the
WIND-CHILL FACTOR will make it feel like it’s only 10 degrees out there.” Wind
chill has zero effect on most of the broadcast audience. It only affects bare
skin, making the temperature seem lower when the wind gusts push cold air across
it. Most of us wear winter clothes when it’s cold outside. If we walked around
in shorts, flip flops and T-shirts, then the wind chill factor would have an
impact, but not if we’re bundled up.
And,
it’s not enough for them to just frighten us about impending weather. They
forecast what going to happen next week, with a five-day tale of dread. It’s wrong 50% of the time, at least when I
write it down and then see what happens five days later. Not a scientific
analysis, but good enough for me.
It’s
a wonder we dare leave our houses, with all the hype about the dangerous conditions
outside. I’m hoping that someday we might get back to calling it winter weather,
summer weather, and the media won’t feel a need to lecture us, as though we are
little kids, unable to cope with it on our own. And, they can stop telling us
to wear a coat, take an umbrella, drink plenty of water, stay in the shade.
Maybe then I’ll stop yelling at my TV. The news media and the meteorologists
they put out front are the real danger, making mountains out of mole hills and
crying wolf so often that when a real wolf comes to town, we ignore the warning.
There! I’m good for another year!
Comments,
complaints? Send to mlessler7@gmail.com
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