December 21, 2016 Article

The Old Coot opts out. 

By Merlin Lessler

I had a bad start to the day last Thursday. I slipped into my coat, grabbed my cell phone and headed down the sidewalk to the Village Kitchen. The owners, Ike and Julie, call it the Owego Kitchen, but when it was under construction I got the name wrong (Village Kitchen) and seem to be incapable of correcting the mistake in my lamebrain. I don’t know what the big deal is. I call both Robert and Tom, Tim. Lynn, Laura, Ray, Roy. But, it is a big deal to my friend Darrel, who insists his name is Daren. Every time I say Village Kitchen he falls out of his chair laughing, “You old coot! It’s the OWEGO Kitchen!” This, from a guy, who doesn’t know his own name.

So anyhow, I was headed into town with a spring in my step, as much as an old guy can muster, and turned on my phone. It went through its start-up calisthenics and after it got settled it flashed that message we all dread, “Battery critically low;  connect to your phone charger……” It took the spring right out of my step and laid a cloud of gloom across my horizon. “How would I survive the morning on 14%?”

That’s when I mentally slapped myself up-side-the-head and gave “him,” (me) a talking to. “You’ve gone without a phone in your pocket for more than three score years and now you’re in a panic because your battery is down to 14%? Oops; now it’s at 13%.” So, I turned it off! It took a block or two of nervous adjustment and then a peaceful feeling settled in. I was disconnected, no phone, no earbuds and no Lew Sauerbrey on the radio to block the sounds of a flock of geese flying overhead and birds twittering in the trees along the way. No news of world affairs (all bad usually) and no text messages intruding into the pleasure of a pleasant stroll down the street. Even for an old coot, this was a welcome treat.

It's amazing how a low battery notice on a phone can alter our mood. That such a handy device can turn on us, and send us into a state of stress. I didn’t realize how much power I’d turned over to an unlocked, used Samsung smart phone. It’s time for a change. I hope it shows up with 14% every morning, so I can shut it off until I really need to reach out, or to let the world reach in. Who’s in charge here anyhow?

Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! 

Comments? Complaints – mlessler7@gmail.com