By Merlin Lessler
This took me a while (more mulling it over, than actual time with pen and
paper) to find a politically correct way to write about Political Correctness.
Just who decides what is politically correct and what isn’t? Who makes the
rules? Not, I venture to say, the “offended” party. More likely, some
pretentious, look down their nose at the great masses type of person who, when they were in elementary
school, were either the
teacher’s pet (do they have them anymore?) or the class tattletale.
I must admit, I was plagued by both types when I was in
grade school (as it was called in my day). The few times I raised my hand with
the correct answer in my head, instead of faking it and hoping not to be called
on, the teacher’s pet got the nod. I only was called on when I was goofing off
and didn’t even hear the question. The tattletales back then were often the
teacher’s PET as well, and
never missed it when one of us passed a note, threw a spitball or slipped a
piece of Juicy Fruit gum out of our pocket. They immediately reportedus to the
teacher and we ended up “doing time” in the hall, the cloakroom or when it was
a serious offense, enduring a “chat” with the school principal.
I’m positive the politically correct movement grew because
of the two types of “do gooders” I grew up with: the tattletalers and the
teacher’s pets. When I make the slightest mistake, and say Indian instead of
Native American, a grown-up tattle tale is right there to point out my offense.
I’m not talking about truly racists, sexist or crude designations. I’m talking
about a minor misstep, the kind that most of us make every so often. Mostly
because we don’t have a subscription to the Politically Correct Newsletter.
This approved way of speaking (and thinking)extends far
beyond the use of insulting or cruel words and phrases. It has expanded to such
a degree that it reminds me of George Orwell’s “Newspeak” in his famous book,
“1984,” where it (Newspeak) was used to limit a citizen’s freedom of
thought—personal identity, self-expression and free will. Our current form of Newspeak goes even further. You
can’t mention you had a burger and fries at MacDonald’s without getting a “Tsk,
Tsk,” from the Newspeak crowd – “Bad, bad food! Eat salad!” Child’s play is
another target. NO DODGEBALL. – Tie scores at all pee-wee soccer, baseball and
lacrosse games. Fairy tales are out – Too scary! The mean stepmother in
Cinderella, the troll under the bridge and the witch in Hansel and Gretel are
taboo – even though fairy tales started the processto help kids understand that
there are bad people and bad outcomes in the real world.
Buy a dog? Even that gets critiqued, “Is it a rescue dog? Did
you buy it at a pet store? Did the breeder do a background check on you before
letting you “adopt” the dog?” (The correct answers are: Yes, No, Yes.)
The worst thing about Newspeak is the “Gotcha!” factor. You
make an innocent, and rather mild, slip of the tongue and the “Masters” of
correct language pounce! That is their modusoperandi, Brow beat and publicly
shame you into conforming. But still, I wonder,
who is it that makes the rules?
Comments? Complaints? Send to mlessler7@gmail.com
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