The Old Coot can’t “rest” in peace.
By Merlin Lessler
I stopped at a rest area in Pennsylvania on my way home from
Florida. Florida is mandatory for old coots. People there hate it when the
“snow birds” arrive, but the north loves it. A large metal sign was prominently
placed along the walkway to the rest rooms. It listed 21 rest area rules. There
used to be two posted rules: trucks to the left, cars to the right. Now, they
list all the things that are taboo in a Pennsylvania rest area. Some are so
obvious, all you can say is, “DUH!”
It wasn’t always like this in America. Good manners weren’t
made into rules and then criminalized. But, in today’s culture, when someone
does something unmannerly, our public officials react with a new regulation.
It’s the same mentality I suffered under in grade school (elementary school, to
those of you born after 1970). If a kid in class (not me) wrote, “Johnny is a
jerk,” on the blackboard when the teacher wasn’t looking, the teacher would
make all of us sit at attention at our desks until the guilty party confessed.
The whole class got punished. No recess. No arts and crafts. No gym class.
It’s the same thing in the grown up world. If some jerk does
something stupid (not me), the bureaucrats and politicians rush in to impose
regulations on the rest of us. Things must have gotten pretty bad at rest areas
in Pennsylvania. At least if you read through the 21 rules in effect. I’ll
admit it; I was the only one who gave the sign a second glance. Still, everyone
was on notice; no one could claim ignorance of the law as a defense.
What did the sign say? What did some official feel we needed
to be told? Hang on; here are a few. Don’t start a bon fire or drive on the
lawn. Don’t let you dog roam free or unload livestock. Don’t deface the
building or deliver illegal drugs. Do not cut down the plants or indecently
expose yourself. Don’t solicit for or engage in prostitution. Don’t set up camp
and go on vacation. Don’t change the oil in your car, fire a gun or shoot an
arrow. That’s a few of the things the State of Pennsylvania thought we needed
to be told. I’d list more, but my wife tooted the horn to get me moving and my
note taking came to an end.
I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. We have so many rules
these days that the country is practically paralyzed. We’re a stuck society!
You hardly dare make a move. Try to fix or build a house; the list of rules you
have to follow is staggering. Start a business or run a business, there isn’t a
word to describe the layers of regulations that have to be accommodated. We
need a reset. Maybe back to the rules that were in place when Eisenhower was
president. If we don’t, we’ll eventually need to consult an attorney just to
stop at a rest area.
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